January 1, 2007

New Years Day; a good day to be lazy and watch a lot of football and eat all day. My kind of day. I woke up this morning with a phone call from Karen. She told me that she went to bed at 10:30p on New Year's Eve. That is really something when I can stay up later than my children. But then maybe her taking care of 15 children might have something to do with being tired. She will fly out of Honduras Thursday morning and it will be a long day for her. I can't wait to see her. Dorian is also going to Nicaragua on Thursday to visit his family. As I began my day, I rode the exercise bike for 2 miles and it felt like 20. Boy am I out of shape. It will get easier, right? My eating habits today have not been the best though. 2008 is the year to live out loud. Do you remember the song? Well that is my theme song for the year. I want to become more real in my day to day interactions with others.
Yesterday I forgot to mention another group of people that I am lucky to have in my life; My co workers. Terri is the most conscientious person I know. She always is willing to help out anyone else to the point of making me ashamed at times. Gabrielle is young and working with her is like working with my daughter. But her heart is so caring and she is willing to learn. Our unit takes care of each other and that is nice. I have another friend at work who amazes me; Ann has become a good friend in 2007 and I have come to depend on her. I am blessed to have these people in my life.
God has always given me special people in my life at each point in my journey. He continues to bless me daily. As I have thought about a new year and new promises to do better I am reminded of Cindy at Casa De Esperanza. Cindy ends up in a lot of trouble and she will tell you that she wants to be good but can't. When dealing with her you can get very frustrated and even foolish when she head butts you and knocks the breath from you. Today I am thinking of Cindy and how many times my Father is frustrated and listens to me say how I want to be a better person but keep messing up. And there are times that I actually hurt Him in my rebellion....But He still loves me and forgives all my wrong actions and he never give up on me. Thinking about Cindy and thinking about me, I think I try my rules more than she and it is ok. I mean when Cindy acts out I try to hide my frustration and love her no matter what. When she physically hurts me, I tell her I love her but it is sometimes hard not to let her see the frustration. So Cindy and I am pretty much the same; trying and wanting to do good but oftentimes caught up in past issues and wanting to feel in control and God gently forgives me everytime. God is good, all the time.
It is cold and snowing tonight and I am wondering how I can get my truck to make it out of development tomorrow am to go to work. I am thinking of all the clients I need to see and wondering if I can get to them in the snow. I am thinking ahead to tomorrow night when WVU is playing in a bowl game and can't wait to see them soar. The next day, I have a dentist appt. and then Karen comes home. Trying to sort out what to do when and how and when to celebrate Lisa's birthday on Saturday. So as I go to bed tonight, I pray that God will give me clear thoughts and let me focus on what I need to focus on. I pray that I can continue to stay focused and continue to exercise. I am somber too much and I want to smile more and whine less. I want to celebrate more and complain less. I want to love God and love those who God loves. Pray for me. and remember this is a journey don't forget to collect souvenirs along the way.